…meanwhile in Korea…

Little Friend-Shaped Holes

Living on the other side of the planet, there are countless people that I miss. It’s hard to be so far away. Sometimes it hurts. But when I reflect, I think I have the easier end of the bargain. When I left for Korea, the people nearest and dearest to me were left with little Ashley-shaped holes in their lives. All the places we went together, the activities we’d normally share, they still very much inhabit that space. My absence might be a little more obviously felt in those familiar surroundings. Korea, however, is markedly different in just about every way. Different geography, people, food, culture, language, everything. I miss my people back home dearly, but there’s also a sort of dissociation and disconnection that can happen. My life here is so different. It’s easy to get enthralled in the distinctness of life here and feel a bit distant from the people and things I miss. There was never a space here that was occupied by those precious loved ones from back home.

That is, until July of this year. My dearest friends Amy and Jacques came to visit. They set to work right away, making memories and carving little holes in my Korean life. It was both bizarrely surreal and utterly natural to have them here in Korea, sharing in my experiences. It was an incredibly special and joyful thing. The three of us packed into my tiny studio apartment, playing a three week long special the-floor-is-luggage edition of the floor-is-lava game. I can’t imagine any other couple I’d rather be in such close quarters with for so long. I’d say they were like family, except that family actually tends to fight in such scenarios, and we did not.

We managed to pack in quite a lot of activity during their trip. A Chimaek (chicken & beer) Festival in Daegu, sightseeing around Asan, participating in our weekly language exchange, walking around the traditional five day market, eating all the quintessential Korean foods, a day at my school with my students, palaces in Seoul, cat cafe, raccoon cafe, a night out in Itaewon complete with kebab at the end of the night, drinking in the park in Hongdae while listening to street performers, lazy days at the beach in Sokcho, lighting fireworks off on the beach at night, jeon and makgeolli while watching the waves crash in, soaking up some sun on Busan’s beaches, classy cocktails and bars with secret entrances, eating all sorts of raw and writhing sea creatures, exploring a seaside temple, home cooking and relaxation in Samcheonpo, a random technicolor filled stop in Daejeon, and a final late night filled with noraebang culminating in the destruction of a beautiful cake.

It was a truly memorable and wonderful time for me. It was rewarding to be able to share firsthand what my life here is like, for them to see all the things that brought me back and keep me here still. The sights, the sounds, the foods, the amazing friends and community I’ve found. It’s one thing to talk of these things or see photos posted online, but it’s quite another to be able to share the full immersive experience firsthand. And although I’ve felt their absence more acutely since they came and left and made their mark in my life here, there are some holes that are just worth having.